June 23rd, 2004

flower

(no subject)

Dear Dad,

Yeah, okay they're gone now. You happy? I'm sure you're loving the patch of raw red flesh instead, aren't you? Fuck you. It's not like I'm getting it for real. You know sure as hell I would never get it for real. But no. You just have to act the little fuck that you knew you can be, call it ugly, call me ugly, and order me to get rid of it. I fucking love you too.

It's just marker damn it! They're in no way permanent, and in no way have anything to do with you. Fuck you. Fuck you fuck you fuck you. I want out of this stupid house, this stupid family, this stupid fuck that is the life you want me to live.

God. So yeah. The wings are gone. My dad thinks I'm ugly. My mom does too, but she's nice about it at least. Well, they've got my sister to fawn over. May I go now?

~ Steph
flower

And so the world returns it its.... normal wordly self

=.= Why. am. I. up. at. 7. in. the. bloody. morning?!

Oh yeah. Daddy decided he was sorry and came over to give the not-exactly-apologize-but-try-to-make-things-better-with-his-daughter-anyway speech.

*shrug* It's the most I can expect from him. I'm grateful for what he's willing to give. Of course, no conversation between the two of us is ever complete without mention of school, studying, work, etc. (Same with my mother, come to that... oO) so.... Mari, I'm to ask to borrow your calculus notes/tests.

....Do you even take notes?

Anyway. I'm up. And I can't go back to sleep. *flops over* I went to sleep at 2 in the bloody morning. Why am I not dead on my feet?

Oh, it's kicking in now. *flops over onto desk* Maybe if I try really hard now, I can go back to sleep... *crawls back to bed and slumps down onto it* Goo'night.

PS. Thank you. All of you. I literally went on LJ this morning, stared at the number of comments I'd received, read them all, then started bawling. I love you people.
  • Current Music
    Rei Hino (Keiko Kitagawa) - Sakura Fubuki
flower

Oh. My. God.

Even more startling news.

I have green happy faces!!!

Er... Azureus. My Bittorrent downloads. Which means my downloads are going very, very well.

After several months of straight yellow, sickly looking faces, I have green happy faces! Fast downloads! And I didn't do anything!

I am in fact running out of space however... oO

*runs to burn things off, forgetting about sleep alltogether*

On a sidenote: I have one Moon Child as .avi file, and I have on .sht file for subtitles. Is it possible to make said Moon Child a vcd and still have subtitles? Does anyone know?
  • Current Music
    Gackt - Papa lapped a pap lopped