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30 October 2005 @ 02:56 am
I always fall for the jerks. Especially when they can be one of the most awesome people I know, too.

So, what happens when I'm head over heels with one? Actually?

Sigh. Nothing like a blow to the ego when you tell him as much and he avoids answering you. And has been ignoring you for the past few weeks.

I don't like being on this end of the unrequited love chain. Nor do I understand men: I know he liked me before. That much was bleeding obvious. What happened in the last two weeks to change that? Damn it, I'm finding out tomorrow. If I can't, I give up completely. That's if I still can anymore. Gah.

CS exam on Monday too. Gah I need to study for it. But damn it, I can't concentrate. Yet another reason why Steph should not violate her precepts and reorganize her priorities. For anyone. Ever.

Might turn out to be for the best, I guess. One more month and I won't see him again for another 4, 5 years.

The idea of being without him though, it still makes my chest hurt to think about it. GAH.

My head hurts too, but I think that's more because the Advil's wearing off rather than impending heartbreak.

On a side note, Steph, Cherry and Florence wemt to the Stag Shop today. Steph bought a pair of sleeves. She would've snatched up a corset if it hadn't cost over $60 and she doesn't carry that much cash with her. It would've also been a bit awkward to explain, but whatever. It was pretty. Actually pretty. It was also amusing to watch the other two stare in awe at everything in there and make awkward conversation.

PS: Anyone ever notice that whenever I try to talk about something emotionally important to me, I tend to get all stilted from trying to keep from doing the exact opposite and gushing out the woes of my life? I'm still trying to figure out which way's more effective. :S
Current Mood: depresseddepressed
Nananinanani on October 30th, 2005 09:37 am (UTC)
*kicks the jerk, even though I don't know him*
Indeed, don't reorganize your life for anyone. You're your first priority.

Good luck with the exam.
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 30th, 2005 02:02 pm (UTC)
Hehe. But I've gone and realized since I posted that really, my priorities have ALWAYS been rather like that. I have this propensity to liking to do things for other people. Making other people happy tends to be my first priority. I think this is one of those times where I make the exception to the rule and was just.... selfish about it.

;p Well I think I'm entitled to being a selfish chit if I like a guy! Now... if only it were reciprocated, damn it... *mutters to self*
M.: thumb heartwolfgrin on October 30th, 2005 09:56 am (UTC)
though i'm talking to you anyways, p.s. i loveth you! ♥
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 30th, 2005 09:58 am (UTC)
*giggles* Good. ^_^
Ryugoryu482 on October 30th, 2005 04:44 pm (UTC)
That side of the unrequited love chain is more fun. jk, me with horrible joking again. All kidding aside, I know how tough that is, as i've dealt with it numerous times.

Most effective way to discuss emotional stuff, is to talk about how you feel at the moment. Sounds easy, but it's not always.
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 30th, 2005 05:56 pm (UTC)
Guh, but I hate that. I'm so not made for the musical story of all my woes.
Sarah: myv // schoolin'starbuck on October 30th, 2005 06:46 pm (UTC)
*pets* Sorry things haven't worked out with him, but it will probably end up for the best (if this is about the same guy that I had initially heard remarks about).

P.S. What are you doing for co-op btw? Where is your placement?
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 30th, 2005 07:15 pm (UTC)
*laughs* Can't really end if it hasn't even begun. Shrug. Never know how it's going to end.

And i don't have a job yet. So I'm currently wondering what I'm doing for the next four months... :S
feneryfenery on October 30th, 2005 09:08 pm (UTC)
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 30th, 2005 10:42 pm (UTC)
*huddles against you and keeps on questioning herself* @.@
Hareimachang on October 31st, 2005 03:17 am (UTC)
*smacks him* God I hate feeling like that. I wouldn't wish it upon anyone.
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 31st, 2005 06:21 am (UTC)
*runs back to nuzzle him* I haven't stopped liking him! I just once in a while feel like kicking things from frustration. ^_^;
Hareimachang on November 1st, 2005 06:33 pm (UTC)
lol I didn't kill him. I smacked him because he's not being good to you. Everyone can recover from a smack.
Stefaniaasuka_tsuzuki on October 31st, 2005 08:17 am (UTC)
I agree with Nanani.
And good luck for your exam *hugs*
Stephaniemirroredsakura on October 31st, 2005 03:42 pm (UTC)
*laughs* Merci.

And as for boys... well, I will let them come as they like. Whether or not I'm willing to sink in and hold fast is a completely different story. ^^
aylengyraylengyr on November 1st, 2005 03:14 am (UTC)
me is sorry your having guy problems! *hugs* guys are usually evil nasty people. I apologise for man, it needs an attitude adjustment.